I AM Rosie Riveter

I had a lovely surprise this morning. It all started with the ring of the doorbell and a man standing on the other side with some not-so-great news. He asked if I knew that my tires had been slashed. I said no and went to the driveway to investigate hoping he was seriously mistaken. Unfortunately he was not. Both passenger side tires had been slashed and were puddled like forgotten snowmen. I thanked him for letting me know and immediately called the police to file a report. Within minutes a deputy arrived, asked me a few questions, looked at the tires and left. At this point I wasn't exactly sure who had done this but I suspected my next door neighbors were somehow connected. My next call was to Nathaniel and then my parents. I informed Nathaniel of the days excitement and asked to borrow my parents' pickup. Next I began the task of removing the two worthless tires. Not easy. While I was outside my neighbors returned from an outing. I spoke with them and it turns out that they'd been struck by The Slasher as well and had a pretty good idea who it was. Apparently their sons were friends with some ass named JOHN SELF who stole some of their video games last week. They told the asshole never to come back so the next morning they awake to find a slashed tire. Later that day the kids run into him at McDonalds where he asks if they've had any troubles with their van (all BUT admitting that he was the culprit). Then this morning they also awoke to yet another tire slashing. Why he thought MY tires needed slashing too is beyond me. I called the police again and told them I had a pretty good idea who they should be hunting down and when I gave the name they said they knew him pretty well. I got back to work and my parents arrived soon after. My mother and I had to make a run back to their house for a hollow metal pipe to place on the end of the tire iron for more leverage when loosening the lug nuts...and to use as a weapon should I ever run into the shitdick punk who crossed this mother of all bitches...but I digress. I got the pipe, got the tires off, and headed out to buy new tires. I waited almost 2 hours at the tire place burning daylight before I got what I needed and that was only after I went to the counter to ask for a progress report. The douche behind the counter sifts through some papers and says, 'oh, you must be Amanda your tires are all set.' Idiot. No telling how long he would have let me sit there. By that time it was almost dark, I got the tires on just as the last rays of light from the sun faded.

I had a feeling all week, something in the back of my head telling me that something was going to happen to my tires. I just had no idea THAT was going to happen. So now I'm tired, sore, and filthy but I feel like one badass Mother. Sometimes I'm glad Nathaniel isn't always around because I've learned how to deal with some pretty random and weird events in his absence. I'm stronger and more independent than I thought. It could have been worse and I'd have to say that in some respects I did enjoy this little learning adventure!

By the way, if you know this JOHN SELF fellow tell him I said hello and thank you and to come on by anytime, I'll be waiting, because I have an AK-47, a tire iron, a metal pipe and I damn sure know how to use them.